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<title>Tell My Love I'll Miss Her by notexactlycappuccinointheclouds</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29053587">Tell My Love I'll Miss Her</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/notexactlycappuccinointheclouds/pseuds/notexactlycappuccinointheclouds'>notexactlycappuccinointheclouds</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Neal Caffrey dies every month of 2021 [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>White Collar (TV 2009)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Canon Divergence, Gen, Killing a character once a month (2021)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 07:13:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>711</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29053587</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/notexactlycappuccinointheclouds/pseuds/notexactlycappuccinointheclouds</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternate ending to Out of the Box in which Neal gets on the plane.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Neal Caffrey/Kate Moreau, Peter Burke &amp; Neal Caffrey</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Neal Caffrey dies every month of 2021 [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2131542</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Killing a character once a month of 2021</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Tell My Love I'll Miss Her</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Written for the “Killing a character once a month 2021” challenge by Dorthea. Specifically, the switching places prompt.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“You said goodbye to everyone but me. Why?” </p>
<p>Of course Peter would ask that, wouldn’t he? Of course he would know exactly what to say to make Neal second-guess himself. And Peter being Peter, he wouldn’t accept a simple “I don’t know.” A simple goodbye. </p>
<p>“You’re the only one who could change my mind.” </p>
<p>“Did I?” </p>
<p>Neal looked at him, then glanced over at the plane. Later on, this moment would always come back to Peter. The black turtleneck, the smell of jet fuel, the crisp winter air. The way Neal lingered on that split-second choice of leaving for Kate or staying for Peter. The indecision — the frustration — in his eyes almost looked like tears. <br/>When Neal walked away, Peter watched him. Every smooth and perfect step. Years later, his dreams would bring back up the exact rhythm of Neal Caffrey’s Italian leather shoes striding across that tarmac. In those dreams, sometimes Peter would stop him, physically hold him back from getting on that plane. But in reality, Peter kept telling himself that Neal would turn around. Neal would decide to stay. He just needed a minute, that’s all. He’d come back. <br/>As Neal walked up the steps to the plane, he forced himself not to stop and take one last glance at Peter. He thought of something a cop in a bar had once told him about never looking back when you walk away. He focused on that memory. Sitting there beneath a neon Budweiser sign, swirling cheap whiskey in a glass, and making small talk with a drunk behind a badge. He’d had this queasy feeling in his stomach thinking about his dad, wondering if his dad was anything like this guy. Drunk and crooked and mumbling advice most likely taken line for line from a spaghetti western. What had that con been again? Mozzie would remember. Mozzie always remembered that kind of thing. Neal couldn’t even recall what he’d lifted off the guy, if that had even been the point. <br/>While stepping onto the plane, he thought about the acrid taste of bottom shelf whiskey and made a mental note to ask for a glass of wine as soon as they got in the air. <br/>Kate was waiting for him inside. He wrapped his arms around her. Held onto her like she was life itself. He took in the lavender scent of her hair and the way she rested her cheek against his neck. <br/>After they stepped apart, Kate excused herself and told Neal to go ahead and take a seat. He took the window seat. He knew how much she preferred the aisle. She’d always said something about the view making her nervous. <br/>Peter was still standing out there, like he wouldn’t admit defeat until the plane took off. Maybe not even then. Neal had spent years dreaming about freedom, and in all his dreams it felt better than this. He shouldn’t have felt like a man losing everything. <br/>Neal watched out the window as Peter finally turned his back. He couldn’t help a pang of disappointment. He’d thought Peter would stick around a little longer. Neal counted the man’s steps as he walked away. And everything was speeding up all of a sudden. Peter was leaving too fast. This was all happening too fast. Neal needed to catch his breath. The air in the plane was too thick. Neal needed to breathe. He needed to go talk to Peter. He couldn’t leave things like that. <br/>He unbuckled his seat belt and stepped out into the aisle, heading for the airplane door as the flight attendant prepared to close it. Neal leaned out the doorway, not quite exiting but almost. He stood there. “Peter”. His voice was loud and clear and Peter turned back immediately. Of course he did. Peter never gave up. Peter, deep down, always believed in Neal. <br/>Peter saw Neal’s face. He knew that Neal was going to come back. Neal was one breath away from walking back down those steps. </p>
<p>Peter didn’t so much hear the explosion as feel it. Neal didn’t feel it at all. One moment he was there. The next he was gone. Of course. Neal always did that — disappeared. Only most times, he came back. This time he couldn’t. </p>
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